YOU KNOW YOU'RE A PERSONAL TRAINER WHEN...

I’ve been a personal trainer for a few years. I’ve worked with every type of client and seen every type of strange thing you can see in a gym setting. There’s whining, people are conducting therapy sessions next to the squat rack machine, someone’s taking selfies, Zumba music is blaring, a trainer is yelling out a client’s remaining reps and someone’s discussing protein powder over the free weights.

I’ve noticed more and more my inclination to want to “help” randos on the street or in the gym… I want to run up to strangers and fix their posture or smack fast food out of people’s hands. I don’t, though, because that’s not socially acceptable.

That got me thinking – what other random things do I notice now that I’ve been a trainer for a few years.

You know you’re a trainer when…

  • you assess random strangers’s exercise form – NO! You’re not supposed to jut your knees out that far during a squat! Why are you swinging that dumbbell like that? I don’t think that’s even an exercise!
  • you immediately scrutinize someone’s posture – If you just let me adjust your shoulders, random-stranger-on-the-street, I promise your lower back will feel a ton better.
  • Nike & Reebok are considered “business casual” – Hello, tax write-off!
  • a friend or family member eats something they shouldn’t, immediately feels guilty and tries to justify it to you  – Life would be so much easier if I could just follow you around and smack food out of your hand.
  • you get excited if you have less than 2 training session cancellations per day  – Unless it’s December. In which case I’m just happy if a client shows up at all.
  • you can tell, in under 5 minutes with a new client, whether they are going to take their training seriously or not – It’s pretty easy to tell if you are there because a family member forced you (you’d be surprised how many “loving” guys have fat-shamed their significant others into training sessions – I’d be pretty bitter in that situation, too) or if your true desire to change just isn’t quite there yet.
  • I ask you if you’re ready, and it’s a rhetorical question – Because, honestly, I’m going to make you start whether you’re ready or not.
  • you get a sick enjoyment making your clients do burpees & they look like they’re going to cry – It doesn’t help that I giggle manically right before I tell a client they need to do burpees. It’s probably giving away the surprise.
  • the more your client sweats, the more accomplished you feel – I got a client sweating profusely within the first 10 minutes of her workout and I swear, I wanted to high-five myself.